Ingredients:

• 2 Cans RAID Wasp and Hornet Killer, $7 at the Home Depot
• 1 80″x80″ patch of burlap – fine mesh, $4 at the Home Depot
• 1 Roll duct tape
• 1 Sweatshirt (or tight knit sweater), long sleeved
• 1 Pair leather work gloves.
• 1 pais scisors
• 1 source of light, preferrably NOT a flashlight

Prepare: It is night time, or early morning, the sun is not out, and its as cold as it’s going to get. Be fully dressed: shoes, socks, long jeans, shirt. First read the directions on the can of Raid (do this *now*) and remove the safety device so that the cans are usable. both these things will be hard to do once you’re dressed. Also secure an escape route… it should be indirect, and secluded. It should not be far from secure shelter with easy access. but make sure there are *NO* obstacles in the way… getting there should be easy.
Dress: Cut a 3 foot by 3 foot square of the burlap cloth (which is see-through up close) and put it over your head so that one of the corners of the square comes down and ends at your chest. Slip the Sweatshirt on over the burlap. This should force the burlap into a helmet of sorts. pull your socks up OVER your jeans, and duct tape (half on socks hald on jeans) to prevent any insect entry. Pull your gloves on over your sweater. and duct tape to prevent insect entry.

Attack: At this point you should resemble, to your neighbors, something our of a horror film. Take your scarecrow-from-hell looking self on over to the wasps nest…. Indirectly, if possible, illuminate the wasps nest. From as far back as possible soak the ever loving heck out of the nest and closely surrounding area with an entire can of raid. If you missed some, or your aim was off, or if you’re getting some perverse gleee from this carnage, use the other can as well. The wasps should not attack, they should fall to the ground… but if they do, try not to panick… you’re prepared. They shouldn’t be able to get close to you.

Retreat: If there are wasps *on* you, knock them off and or squish them as best as possible. Move to your staging area which is away from and not easily accessible by the wasps… Remove the tape from the gloves (using scisors to speed things up) and remove the gloves, place them aside as they could be covered with a poison that is toxic to you as well. Remove the sweatchirt. Remove the tape from the ankles, move inside shelter. Close your windows, turn on the AC, and get some sleep. The nest should be dead in the morning.

Cleanup: after a day or two there should be no sign of life. Remove the nest so thsat no other animals decide to use it as a home.